this is straight from honeymag.com:
There was a time after Destiny’s Child broke up, when I was out of the spotlight. I was trying to figure out what to do. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to do music again — be in a group or go solo. Actually, the thought of going solo was very scary to me. I didn’t think I could do it and would get mad when people told me I should record an album by myself.
I wasn’t upset about losing a chance to go to the Grammy’s or any celebrity perks. It was the loss of the friendship that was difficult. That was the hardest part of the separation. These girls [Beyonce, Kelly Rowland, LaTavia Roberson] were my friends from elementary school. We went to church together, we hung out together.
To go from that to sitting across from each other in a courtroom and going through all that law stuff, was just crazy. You just kind of look at each other differently. That’s when I realized that the friendship had died. Figuring out how we were going to split assets and profits and all of that felt like a divorce. Right after the break up, I went to stay with my friend in Atlanta who had me in church Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. I was developing my relationship with God. It helped me understand that I didn’t create my path. I wasn’t stressing, I wasn’t worrying. I was just praying and letting Him reveal what he had for me.
God is so amazing. Recently, I ran into Kelly and we got to catch up briefly. It was one of those things where you never know how the other person is going to react. But it was relaxed. I think we’ve both gotten to the age where it’s like, Girl please! She even hit me up the other day to let me know she was traveling. I would love to have a close friendship again, but that’s on God’s time.
The experience taught me about how things can be manipulated in the public. Like with the situation with Matt Kemp. I think the blogs kind of created the whole relationship. We were friends – there was nothing more to it. When we went out, a lot of times we had lots of other mutual friends there, but people would single us out. I definitely thought he was cute, but it was never anything like that. They had it on blogs that we were dating and this happened and that happened – but that’s not it.
Right now, I am dating this work. It’s kind of hard to run into people you can trust. You just never know what their thing is or what they want to get out of the situation. At this point, I don’t want to get into dating. I’m focused on work and if he comes, that’s great.
I’m now based in Los Angeles. I moved here for acting. Between albums, I made the decision to come to Los Angeles and find an agent and have him direct what I do. My first audition was Preachers Kid. Thankfully, I nailed it and got cast for the role of Desiree. Four days before we went into production, I was cast for the leading role of Angie. I’d never done a film, let alone starred in one, but luckily, I had an amazing acting coach, Troy Roland, who helped me through it.
Not long after that, I got selected for The Killers, which is debuting in June with Ashton Kutcher and Katherine Heigl. I’m telling you — I lost my mind. The character I play is just like Charlotte from Sex and The City. She’s Katherine’s best friend and coworker and believes in love and being in love. It was such a surreal experience. I remember sitting on set with these guys and thinking, Wow, that’s Katherine Heigl from Greys Anatomy and Ashton Kutcher. She’s such a great actor and knows exactly how to turn it on and turns it off. Mr. Kutcher is hilarious and funny and everyone was really professional. All the actors were really supportive; it didn’t feel like everyone was competing.
I still have a ways to go. There’s more I want to do, especially with the youth. I’ve made it a point, especially on the tours to speak to Boys & Girls Clubs of America and at local schools. A lot of teenagers give up easily and fall victim to low self-esteem and peer pressure. I know what that feels like. Like I said before, I was at one time just trying to figure it out and could have gone one way or another. Thank God I have family and friends who lead me in the right direction.
I definitely look at myself as a survivor. I was just telling my friend I think I’ve spent most of my life getting over stuff. But that’s okay. That’s life. If you can’t walk away with something or learn something new, then it was all in vain. Keep your chin up and stay prayed up and just know how awesome you are and know you can do anything. Follow your dreams — you shouldn’t be doing anything else!